Saturday, August 2, 2008


I often wonder how many people actually pray. People will ask us to pray for them or their families and I am left wondering how many of us actually do it. Yesterday, a friend that I went to school with, lost her mom. I am still in disbelief actually. She was young and full of life. She had just pulled out of her road and they are still not to sure what happened. There are no skid marks on the road, it's like she fell asleep at the wheel or passed out. It makes me so sad for the family. I really hope people really are praying for their family. It's going to take God to help them get through this. We've known them all our lives practically. :(

Losing a parent is tough. My mom passed away May 2005-right before we got pregnant w/Aiden. So, there is a part of me that is sad b/c I never got to tell her that we were going to have a baby. OR that she was going to be a grandparent. I think that she would be sooooooo proud of our little boy. My granny, who was like my mom, passed away a year ago in June. That was really hard on my family and still is sometimes. I often think that if I didn't have Aiden, that I wouldn't have made it through that. However, I have to believe that God has better plans for her. She would no longer have to put up w/dialysis,heart problems, fear of more strokes and all the pains older people experience. I am so glad that she got to meet our little boy. She was so proud of him, she often told me that she thought that he was the most beautiful little baby that she had ever laid her eyes on. I can't tell you how proud that made me!!!! I did have so much support. My husband was wonderful, and I know he felt like he lost a parent too b/c my granny thought of him as a son. I have some of the best friends a girl could ever ask for. They were wonderful and a huge support system for us. They made me laugh when all I wanted to do was cry and crawl in a hole somewhere! I still have a hard time dealing w/the fact that she will never see Aiden play ball, have a first date, graduate or get married. I will never get to tell her that I love her again. But, it's ok. I know she is so happy being w/my grandfather again. She's at peace and is watching Aiden grow from a much better "seat". I know prayer works, b/c I am here today. There has to be a God, a awful kind one, at that. One that sees two little girls suffering b/c their mother can't let go of the booze long enough to take care of her kids, one that gives those little girls a loving home w/people that love them and take care of them the way children should be, and one that makes the rest of their lives seem better than where they were. I look at my family today, and can't help but smile. We've all come a long way. We've lost loved ones, had some hard times and had some fights lol, but we are still here for each other. I have the most beautiful little boy ever and the most wonderful husband. As long as I have that-I believe I can make it through anything!

I just hope the Rives family knows that they can too!

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